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In this part…

His part looks at some of the lesser-known hypnotherapy applications. Past-life regression is a fascinating of visiting the past – and even future – lives. Could you have been a cook in the court of Henry VIII? We examine

The evidence and give you the no-nonsense, plain speaking facts.

This part discusses working with children as hypnotherapy subjects to help solve problems such as bed-wetting and anxiety. We also look at removing phobias, using many different hypnotherapy technicques.

T

So, why would your hypnotherapist ask you to do this? Well, simply to find out if your therapy worked. You can lie back in trance imagining whatever

Your therapist wants you to imagine, listening to his suggestions to your heart’s content, but unless this translates into your real life, you still have your phobia. And after all, you went to see your hypnotherapist in the first place so that you can face up to your phobia.

Part of what makes a phobia a phobia is avoidance, so don’t avoid going to see your hypnotherapist. Don’t let that anxiety build and your phobia get

Worse. Pick up the telephone now and book your appointment.

In This Chapter

^ Evaluating ethical issues ^ Seeing how children are affected by hypnosis ^ Being helpful in your child’s hypnotherapy ^ Looking at childhood issues

/f you’re considering taking your child to a hypnotherapist, you can play a crucial role in assuring successful treatment by reading this chapter. We describe how safe hypnosis is for your child, and how you as a parent (and in

This chapter we use the word Parent To refer to the primary guardian of the

Child) can feel comfortable about their hypnotherapy experience.

Children live in a fantasy world for much of their waking hours. Their play and their involvement with television and books require deep imaginative participation.

Watch children at play. When they are deeply engaged and unselfconscious, they are transported to another world! They literally hypnotise themselves into the role they’re playing – be that a warrior, a mother whose doll has become their ‘baby’, or some famous celebrity or sports figure. When my (Mike’s) children are watching the Dora the Explorer Cartoon, they are right there beside Dora and her monkey friend Boots, sharing their adventures in the jungle!

This same state of self-hypnosis would require some work from a hypnotherapist to create in an adult. But children enter this state regularly and with ease. This imaginative sense is exactly the quality of trance that can lead to

Effective hypnotherapy.

Kids – and as an American, I (Mike) use this term affectionately to include children and adolescents – are much easier to hypnotise than adults because they readily access their unconscious mind. As you become an adult, you

Lose some of this ability as society encourages you to become more focused and realistic.

Considering Ethical Issues

As you can imagine, working with children is an extremely serious business

That requires the highest levels of professionalism and sensitivity. There are strict rules that hypnotherapists must adhere to when working with adults, but particularly when working with children.

&H&tr The word Ethics Pertains to the principles of conduct governing an individual " or a profession. Any qualified clinical hypnotherapist belongs to some profes -

Sional hypnotherapy organisation that has a written document explaining the professional do’s-and-don’ts. Usually called something like a ‘Code of Conduct’ or a ‘Code of Ethics’, this list is available for anyone interested to read before an initial session. Simply contact one of the national hypnotherapy organisations listed in the Appendix of this book.

An ethical hypnotherapist will allow you, as the parent, to be with your child throughout treatment sessions in order to ensure you and your child’s confidence. However, the therapist may insist that the child answer some questions him or herself, so that the hypnotherapist can engage with your child

Directly. Also, your view of the problem may be completely different from

Your child’s.

If your presence in the room is absolutely forbidden, you have every right to question why, and if not satisfied with the response, to seek help elsewhere.

You’re welcome to be present in any part of the session, as long as your child agrees. Your absence may be necessary at times to allow your child to speak

Freely.

Alternatively, you may be happy to leave your child alone with a therapist you have confidence in. However, in our experience, by far the majority of

Parents want to be present in sessions and that is usually all right.

The hypnotherapist makes clear his reasons for his decision whether to have you involved in the session, and negotiates the outcome of treatment accordingly. However, he won’t make you (the parent) feel that you have been doing

Things in the wrong way. He may however, occasionally suggest a different strategy to your approach to your child’s problem to ensure success.

Some hypnotherapists may act as brokers between parent and child by asking the child what they would like their parents to do differently in order to help them feel better, or solve their problem. The hypnotherapist can then feed this information back to the parent(s) privately.

Noting the Differences in Hypnotising Children

Working with children is great fun because it’s more like play than work. In fact, it is play. Children don’t require the same sort of explanations of trance or even the same sort of trance inductions used on adults. So a hypnotherapist has to be good at imaginative play to work well with children.

Children are already in a state of hypnosis most of the time. Their world

Revolves around them. Until they develop their Critical factor, A level of maturity that enables them to more objectively analyse information, children tend

To believe that anything is possible and that what adults and authority figures say is true.

An ethical hypnotherapist, skilled at imaginative play, can work well with a child to bring about the desired results. To the observer, the interaction

Between hypnotherapist and child may seem like mere play. But the hypnotherapist understands the heightened state of suggestibility of a child, and is watching for opportune moments to offer therapeutic suggestions when the child is most receptive.

When I (Mike) first hypnotised children, I was often not sure if they were really hypnotised. They would appear wide awake, fidgeting sometimes and still speaking to me. Hypnotised adults are easier to spot because their eyes

Are usually closed, their face and body muscles are very relaxed, and they may even occasionally drool! But because children may not close their eyes,

Their response to trance is very different. This situation requires a more subtle detection on the part of the hypnotherapist.

Of course, children don’t directly tell you that ‘I am now in trance’, so knowing when this occurs is more likely to happen with someone who has been trained to observe the physiological signs of trance – like a

Qualified hypnotherapist!

Two of the biggest differences in hypnotising children and adolescents, as

Opposed to adults, are:

^ Kids don’t need to close their eyes to go into trance. They may still fidget while in trance, but in a subtly different way – more slowed down.

^ Children and adolescents are more trusting, and go more easily and deeper into trance early in therapy. They are particularly suggestible to

Ideas while in trance.

With eyes wide open

Children – and to a lesser extent, adolescents – have such powerful imaginations that unlike most adults, they don’t need to close their eyes to go into a

Hypnotic trance.

You can probably recall vivid childhood imaginings – perhaps something as simple as becoming really involved with playing with dolls, or dreaming of being a superhero. Sporty children may also pretend to be their favourite athlete, and recreate the scenes of prowess and skill they view in sporting events.

Children put themselves into imaginary situations quite easily and naturally. Adults don’t do this without a degree of effort in hypnosis. Adults have to be highly suggestible or in a very deep trance, with previous experiences of hypnosis, before trance is possible with their eyes open.

Similarly, when hypnotising a child, not only is eye closure unnecessary, insisting a young child close his eyes may make him feel unsafe, or at the

Very least, too suspicious to maintain trance.

Adults tend to think that trance requires that you remain physically still. This does not apply to children in hypnotherapy. Children can be in trance and receive hypnotherapeutic suggestions while they are fidgeting in their chair.

In fact, movement can be used as part of inducing a hypnotic trance – if done

Skilfully.

Trance through imagination

Because of children’s strong imaginative sense, hypnotherapists don’t have

To induce trance the same way as they do with adults. Trance with children is

A normal, natural state. It can also be gained, or deepened, through play and by invoking the child’s favourite fantasies or images. This is very different

From adults, with whom it is necessary to answer questions about hypnosis

And gain a great deal of trust first.

For a child or adolescent, the main hypnotherapeutic goal is to engage

Them in their favourite imaginative scenario. The hypnotherapist does this

By simply talking and playfully encouraging them into making this scenario as

All-encompassing as possible.

For example, if you were asked to imagine one of your favourite holidays and what you specifically enjoyed about it, you might be encouraged to elaborate at great length by someone who was genuinely interested in your experience. Chances are that your recall of the events would become increasingly vivid. These memories would be the beginnings of trance.

Trancing through talking

Steve, 15, is an adolescent who came into my (Mike’s) clinic for a problem with nail-biting. Steve’s dad brought him, and asked me a few questions in my office initially. After talking to me about Steve’s problem, asking me standard hypnosis questions and generally checking me out, Steve’s dad volunteered – unprompted – to return to the waiting room. This was great,

Because Steve had remained quiet with his

Father around. Steve was a shy 15-year-old who had begun to experience problems with nail-biting after his parents divorced. He’d had to move to a new school, as a result of the downsizing of the family home. Rather than talk to him in-depth about these changes, I just chatted to Steve to find out what his interests were and what excited him. He began to talk about music and his love of ‘grindcore’ bands – an extreme form of heavy and death metal rock

Music.

He talked about how he had been playing guitar for a while. After moving to his new

School, Steve couldn’t believe his luck when he met two boys who played bass and drums, and who were looking for a guitarist. They liked the same style of music and immediately formed a band. Steve began to go into a light trance as

He described how they ‘totally rocked’ at a

Recent party. This led him into even greater

Fantasies about the band’s plans to record a demo of three songs he’d written. (He sang

A couple of verses which perfectly reflected his own teenage angst. His songs were an appropriate therapeutic outlet for his recent upheavals. They also reflected his feelings of powerlessness in his parent’s break up.)

The more Steve talked about his music ambitions, the deeper his trance became. I encouraged him to talk more about his dreams of

Success and shifted this into an encouragement of how any success could lead to other, possibly unrelated, successes in his life. The old ‘success breeds success’ aphorism. I increasingly talked more generally about success, with the intention of pleasantly relaxing him, and soon he was in a medium-deep level trance. I then gradually introduced suggestions of success in alleviating his nail-biting. And you will be pleased at how successfully and easily you can stop any unwanted habits and have smooth fingernails. See those healthy fingernails as you play guitar. You can also see those healthy nails as indicating your ability to have other successes in the future…’And so on.

I also gave Steve a lot of suggestions for feeling better and happier. (I only hoped that becoming happier would not get him in trouble with his grindcore band members!) When we ended our first session, Steve found it difficult to believe that he had gone into trance, but he was aware that somehow he had. We scheduled one final

Session for the following week.

Interestingly, before our second session Steve’s father rang me excitedly to tell me that Steve had stopped nail-biting for the first time in several years! We still met for one final session to ensure that Steve could learn self-hypnosis to maintain his success.

The same is even truer with children and adolescents; they are likely to go

Even further in their imaginations than adults. This means that an excellent level of trance can be reached as their recollection deepens.

Helping Your Child with Therapy

As a parent you play a crucial role in how effectively hypnosis can help your

Child’s problems.

It is natural for parents bringing their children to hypnosis to be apprehensive. However, the better informed you are (say, from reading information like this), the more relaxed you can be when you come to a hypnotherapist with your child. If you convey confidence, your child feels safe and can benefit from their session. Your child picks up on how you feel about his upcoming hypnotherapy. If you are anxious and uncertain, your child will be more so. Showing confidence that the experience will be a good one has a positive effect on your child’s participation, and on the results.

As a parent you want to know what you can do to help your child overcome their problem before you make a decision to seek help from a hypnotherapist. Some general things you can do to help your child are:

^ Don’t force them to talk about the problem if they feel uncomfortable. ^ If they Do Want to talk about it, become a better listener by

• Checking with them that you understand what they say.

• Repeating back some of the words they said to you. ^ Avoid blaming, shaming, or teasing them. ^ Avoid offering unwanted, unhelpful advice.

^ Let them know that you love them, and will support them through their

Problem.

^ Gently suggest that they have more control over the problem than they may realise, and that they can solve this problem and not be a victim of it.

^ Encourage them to have hope that the problem will be solved.

The general idea is to give your child support, and really try to restrain from commenting, criticising, or giving advice. Make it your main goal to say less

Than you would normally and convey a supportive attitude.

Making the decision to seek therapy

Try gently suggesting getting help from a hypnotherapist to your adolescent, so that he thinks it’s his own idea. With the increased popularity and success of hypnosis as a therapeutic tool, an adolescent may well recommend it to resolve a personal problem or issue, and have a more vested interest in achieving that goal.

As a caring parent, you can talk about a hypnotherapist to a younger child as

A professional who can help with a particular concern, the same way other

Professionals help with other concerns.

In either case, the parent will accompany the child and ensure the child’s comfort and wellbeing with the hypnotherapist, before and possibly during the first session.

Never pressure your child (or an adult) into seeking help. It may only cause

Resistance to therapy. This can even lead to the child sabotaging their own

Chances for success, out of resentment towards the parent and hypnotherapist.

So one of the best things you can do is to decide together that seeking help is a good idea.

Listening to your child’s hypnotherapist

Every hypnotherapist works with parents differently. Be guided by your child’s hypnotherapist and remember the importance of not undermining your child, or the hypnotherapist. Listen to your child’s hypnotherapist about how to handle your own anxieties.

Ask your child’s hypnotherapist, when you first make an appointment, how much information they need from you. Find out whether he wants you to be present during the session, or for part of the session, or just during the ‘get

Acquainted’ phase. Your child may ask you to be there initially, but discuss

With the hypnotherapist whether you should excuse yourself from the room

At some point. When the time is right will vary, of course, depending on the

Age of your child.

As a concerned parent, you may certainly tell the hypnotherapist what you

Perceive the problem to be with your child, but do it privately. However, be open about how the course of therapy may proceed. Let your child explain

Their problem to the hypnotherapist in their own words. You may be surprised that your child’s perception of the problem is not necessarily the

Same as yours!

It is important that your child feels that he is in the driver’s seat, so that his unconscious mind can prepare to go to work, and not have to depend on

Your authority as his parent. Remember that it is your child’s mind that

Needs to be activated through hypnosis.

Understanding Some Common Childhood Issues

What are some of the problems that hypnotherapists see children for?

^ Anxiety

^ Bed-wetting

We explain in detail how hypnotherapists remove habits in Chapter 5.

A range of other issues may exist. Speak to a hypnotherapist before arranging an initial appointment, to see if hypnotherapy can help your child.

Hiding behind sofas: Dealing With your anxious child

Arguably, children are under more emotional pressure today than ever

Before. Societal, academic, and parental pressures often lead children to anxiety issues that show up in a multitude of ways, including shyness, stuttering, bed-wetting, insomnia, and appetite problems (including both food avoidance and overeating).

If your child is experiencing anxiety related problems, hypnotherapy may be

Ideal for them. Remember, hypnotherapy can help to relax the body, which is

At the root of treating anxiety. Please do not hesitate to speak to a hypnotherapist to see if they can help your child.

Solving bed-Wetting

Bed-wetting – enuresis in medical terms – is one of the most common childhood problems hypnotherapists address.

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Enuresis Is the repeated, involuntary voiding of urine, after an age at which continence (staying dry) is usual – about 3 years of age. This is assuming of

Course, that there are no other possible medical or physical causes. In other

Words, the inability of the child to avoid wetting himself or herself. Enuresis

Is a term most used in conjunction with children, but on rare occasions, it applies to adults.

Housing Cathy’s nightmares

Five-year-old Cathy’s favourite cartoon character is Bob the Builder. Her parents brought her to hypnotherapy because of her recurring, and

Extremely disturbing, nightmares. When her

Parents asked her to describe the nightmares, Cathy could never recall their content.

Cathy could not describe the nightmares to me

Either, so we played Bob the Builder instead. I

Asked her to pretend to be Bob and build something. She became very physically involved with

Building, and during this physical activity I

Spoke to her about the details of the house.

Cathy told me that she was building an imaginary toy doll’s house for the doll she had

Brought. When she completed it we both stood back and admired it. Then I asked her if she could build another house. This time I asked her to build a larger house – one which would be big enough for her to go inside. She agreed.

By now she was in trance, and I suggested that she build a Safe house Made of bricks, like the

One that the Three Little Pigs hid in to escape from the Big Bad Wolf. She smiled and became

Physically very active in building her safe

House. She told me when it was completed and

We commented on her fantastic handiwork.

She enjoyed the praise immensely and added a few more details to her safe house.

I then suggested to her that she could take this house back home and put it in her bedroom. I suggested that she could use that same safe house each night before she went to sleep, and that no one but her could enter it. I said that she would feel very, very happy and safe each night inside the house that she had just built. I asked her to promise me that she would pretend to go inside her safe house each night, before she fell

Asleep. She agreed.

Her parents reported back to me that her nightmares had stopped soon after our first meeting.

^.rABEfl It is common for children to wet their beds during the first two to three years of life. At this age hypnosis is inappropriate as bed-wetting is natural. Even IM ) Continued bed-wetting after the age of 3 years, does not necessarily indicate a problem. However, bed-wetting is considered a problem after the age of 6 years.

Children who bed-wet after the age of 6 years may not have yet developed strong enough bladder muscles to retain large amounts of urine. This is why it is so important to seek your doctor’s help to receive medical tests to confirm if this is the case for your child. Expect the hypnotherapist to ask if your child has been thoroughly tested medically before starting any hypnosis.

There are two types of enuresis: ^ Diurnal enuresis: Wetting occurs during the daytime. This is more

Common in females.

^ Nocturnal enuresis: This is what is more commonly called bed-wetting,

And is more common in males.

Nocturnal enuresis is more common than diurnal enuresis. It can obviously cause unhappiness and distress to the child who experiences it. Parents and

Siblings may inadvertently cause additional shame by chastising or teasing

The child. If punished for bed-wetting, the distress is even further enhanced

For the child. Further unhappiness may occur because of the limitations nocturnal enuresis imposes on social activities and holidays.

The good news is that hypnosis is a very powerful tool in relieving bed-wetting. The hypnotherapist speaks to the child’s subconscious, suggesting that they avoid drinks before bed, wake up if they need to urinate, have

Greater bladder/muscular control, and most importantly, to imagine waking up to a dry bed. (The word Wet Is avoided in treating enuresis – the desired state is dryness – so any words involving wet are counter-productive.)

In This Chapter

^ Looking at what a phobia is

^ Understanding that phobias can be about anything ^ Getting rid of your phobia with hypnotherapy ^ Contracting to face up to your phobia

J\ Re you scared of the dark? Do you freeze with fear whenever a cat saunters nonchalantly across the road in front of you? Do you go apoplectic at the very thought of visiting the dentist? Does the idea of taking a flight to some sunny holiday destination send ice-cold tingles of dread down your spine? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then you have a phobia!

Phobias are one of the most common reasons people seek hypnotherapy.

Many millions of people in this world have phobias. Most manage to get

Along in life without the phobia interfering too much in their day-to-day existence; in other words, the phobia is mild. However, a significant number of

People have phobias that greatly restrict their life in one way or another, and

When these phobias get really bad, people seek out therapy.

Rationalising the Irrational: Defining Phobias

Phobias are not something you are born with. They are something you learn. You learn to fear an object or situation of some kind, and that fear is accompanied by many irrational thoughts and behaviours.

Explaining phobias

A Phobia Is an abnormal fear of an object or situation, experienced immediately when confronted by the object or situation, directly or indirectly,

Through seeing it on television, or in a magazine or book, for example. In general, fear makes you avoid whatever it is that triggers your phobia. So, a phobia involves fear and avoidance, but what else makes a phobia a phobia?

Well, you may have a phobia if you experience any of the following: W Excessive or unreasonable fear: Some situations may induce just a mild

Fear response considered normal or non-phobic, something most people would experience in that situation. Your fear is excessive or unreasonable if you find yourself frozen in place, perhaps wanting to escape, possibly trembling or sweating in that situation.

A fear of heights is a phobia if you are paralysed by fear on the third rung of a ladder, or if simply watching someone standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon on television makes you break out in a sweat.

W You recognise that the fear is excessive or unreasonable: You know

That what you are experiencing is out of proportion to what you should be feeling. You know, for example, that going to visit your dentist should

Only give you a mild anxiety, not that ‘running down the street shrieking

Your head off’ anxiety you experience when you walk in through the

Surgery door.

W The trigger of phobic response always causes anxiety: You either have the response, or not. You can’t be scared of mice one moment and think

That they’re cute the next. W You avoid whatever causes your phobic response: All phobics avoid

Whatever it is that they are afraid of, which is a logical response, really. If you can’t avoid it, then you suffer the experience with intense anxiety or stress. For example, imagine that you have avoided flying for years, travelling wherever you needed to go by car, bus or train. However, for one

Reason or another, you find that you need to travel by plane somewhere.

Getting you on the wretched thing may mean that you have to be dragged

Kicking and screaming, or else you have to be pumped full of enough

Tranquilisers to stop a rampaging bull elephant in its tracks!

Phobic fear most often causes physical and emotional reactions, including any, or all, the following:

W Your breathing may become shallow and your heart race, with just the

Thought of the Possibility Of encountering the object of your fear.

W You feel tense and anxious, altering your life to avoid any encounter.

W You feel a sense of shame or embarrassment at harbouring an obsessive fear, which may, in turn, cause you to withdraw from people who don’t understand your terror.

As your fear looms large in your mind and in your life, you spend a great deal of your time, energy, and thought on it, which actually fans the flame of your phobia.

Oh, and just so you know, phobias can sometimes be accompanied by a Panic attack, Too. During these nasty episodes, your fear rockets through the roof

And rational thought flies out the window, causing your breathing to become

Very rapid and shallow, which is known as Hyperventilating. Hyperventilating increases the amount of oxygen in your blood and brain. You may think that

More oxygen is a good thing, but too much oxygen in your system increases the symptoms you experience during a panic attack, resulting in more fear, trembling, sweating, weakness and tingling sensations in your limbs, and irrational thoughts that you are going to die.

To stop hyperventilating, put a paper bag over your nose and mouth, and breathe into it. This causes you to breathe in carbon dioxide and subsequently brings down the level of oxygen in your system.

Comparing phobias to plain old fear

Phobias involve fear. But does that mean that all fear is really a phobia? The answer is no. One or two things about the fear you experience when you have

A phobic response make that fear very particular to a phobia.

Fear is a natural survival mechanism. In the ancient past, when humans

Lived in caves, the fear response kept us away from things that could harm us. If we didn’t have it, you probably wouldn’t be reading this book today, because the human race wouldn’t exist. Imagine for a moment, that we didn’t

Develop a fear response. You have just left your cave for a nice stroll around your Palaeolithic neighbourhood. On your way you notice a rather large and

Cuddly looking pussycat, fast asleep under a tree. You go up to it (remember, no fear) and start stroking it. The next thing you know: snap! You’re a sabre-toothed tiger’s hors d’oeuvre! Apply that to the rest of the human race and it

Wouldn’t last for very long.

Put fear into the equation and things are different. You’re having your little caveman stroll and see a bundle of fur curled up under a tree. From past experience, you know that similar bundles of fur tend to attack you. As this registers in your brain you begin to feel fear. The fear that you feel makes you become very wary, you back off and return to your cave.

Many feelings of fear stem from a rational sense of survival; you fear what may physically harm you. You may also fear what others around you fear,

Or fear the unknown, or fear what may happen to others close to you.

-jjjABE* The fear you experience with a phobic response is an Irrational fear. YJi\ Basically, it is a fear of an outcome that statistically won’t happen. For exam-IM ) Ple, air travel continues to be far safer than any other form of transportation, so being afraid of dying in a plane crash is an irrational fear. Likewise, pho -

Bias are born of fears of an improbable result you believe will happen when

You encounter the object or situation. For example, it’s highly unlikely that

You will actually have a heart attack if a spider comes near you.

You may be thinking ‘So what about a phobia of snakes? They can hurt you, so that must be a rational fear!’. Yes and no (you probably knew we

Were going to say that). If you walk down the street and come face to face with a boa constrictor slithering along then yes, the fear you experience would be a rational fear. If you were flicking through a magazine and came across a picture of a snake and let out a shriek of fear, then that would be

An irrational fear – a phobic fear. After all, the wretched thing won’t leap out

Of the page at you, will it? Therefore there is no threat to your survival.

So where do phobias come from in the first place? How do you develop them? After all, no one sets out to deliberately become scared of something.

Unfortunately, we don’t have a simple answer. The causes of phobias are as

Varied as phobias themselves. Starting with stress

When you experience severe stress, such as being stuck on a crowded bus in

A traffic jam, or having a project deadline looming at work, your objectivity and ability to rationally analyse the situation may be compromised. The feelings you have as a result of the stress – such as anxiety or fear – can attach

Themselves to whatever you are stressed about.

Even though this is not always the case, when it does happen that means that

If you enter into a similar situation, or come across a similar object, then you

Experience anxiety or fear. Remember, a phobia can occur to anything, so any

Situation in which you find yourself stressed has the potential to turn into a phobia.

Pointing out triggers

Going through an extremely rough patch with your significant other obviously causes a lot of stress. This feeling can become attached to any confrontational situation and therefore result in you developing a phobia of confrontation.

However, your mind is a fickle thing and sometimes the fear is attached to something unrelated; you become scared of that and not of whatever it was that frightened you in the first place.

KPUi A patient came for therapy with a phobia of buttons (quite a common phobia, as it happens). He felt okay when confronted by buttons attached to clothes, ) but experienced an incredible sense of dread and anxiety when faced with a

YTJ Loose button lying around; convinced that it would suddenly lodge itself in his windpipe. He experienced the fear to such an extent that he couldn’t

Enter a room if he knew there was a loose button somewhere inside. On top of wanting to get rid of his phobia, he also wanted to understand where it

Came from. Using a regression technique (see Chapter 2), he was taken back

To a time in his early teens when he had been summoned into his headmaster’s office in order to atone for some transgression or other. This was in the days when headmasters were still given free rein to take out their sadistic frustrations on their pupils, and our patient ended up being given the cane! What came to light during the regression was that as he was bent over the headmaster’s desk receiving six of the best, he caught sight of a loose button. The stress and anxiety he felt by being given the cane transferred to the button, and from that moment on he began to fear loose buttons in general.

Picking up a phobia from another person

A classic way to assume a phobia is to inherit it from someone who serves as a role model for you. Through witnessing that person’s phobic response, you learn to be afraid of whatever it is that they are afraid of.

A mother who is afraid of mice passes on that fear to her daughter. A son picks up his father’s fear of spiders. When you witness your role model being scared, you believe that the object that he is afraid of is something that you need to be scared of too. Obvious really, if he is scared of it, then there must be something terrible about it. Unfortunately, this is not necessarily true!

However, you don’t pick up phobias only from family members. Anyone you are in close contact with – be it a friend, neighbour, or complete stranger -

Can transmit their phobia to you. Even witnessing a phobic response on film or television can do the trick!

Building up to a phobia

A single experience of something mildly anxiety provoking may not necessarily end up with you developing a phobia of it. However, if you’re repeatedly

Exposed to the same, or similar, experiences then the anxiety can become

Cumulative, reinforcing each experience with more and more fear until,

Wham! – you’re slapped in the face with a full-blown phobia. It’s as though you didn’t see it coming.

Take for example flight crew members who frequently experience varying degrees of turbulence during the flights they make. They appear to cope

(and in most cases they do so very well), but for a few members there is

An underlying feeling of anxiety that gets reinforced with each bout of turbulence, accumulating away in the back of their mind until it springs forth in the form of a full-blown flying phobia.

Creating a phobia from past trauma

A Trauma Is an event that produces a severely painful physical or emotional experience – and could realistically lead to your death or injury. A trauma

Can lead to the development of a phobia of whatever it was that caused you that pain. Even witnessing such an event is traumatic and can result in the development of a phobia.

You’re driving along in your car and some idiot swerves in front of you. Unfortunately, they misjudge the distance and – crash, tinkle! You both end

Up with a trip to the garage to get the major dents in the bodywork of your vehicles beaten out. A car crash comes under the heading of a trauma and is a very frightening experience for all concerned. The next time you think about getting behind the wheel to drive, you may very well begin to experience anxiety. Perhaps you begin to avoid driving. Unfortunately, the more you avoid driving because of the anxiety, the more the anxiety builds. The more

The anxiety builds, the more likely you are to end up with a full-blown driving

Phobia!

Examining the Various Types of Phobia

Each individual phobia has its own particular characteristics. To be helpful, medical science has divided phobias into the following categories:

W Animal and insect phobias: The heading says it all. Any type of animal

Can be included in this category, from cats and dogs, through to cows

And wombats! Insects are traditionally objects of fear, and any of the

Thousands of species that survive on this planet can become a phobic’s worst nightmare.

W Natural environment phobias: These are phobias about some aspect of your environment. For example it may be that you are afraid of the dark – typical in children, but also afflicting many adults too. Or maybe you are

Scared of heights, or water, and so on.

W Blood, injection, and injury phobias: It’s never pleasant having an injection. However, for some this can prove to be the object of a very severe

Phobia. In fact, any medical procedure that is invasive can come under

This category. The sight of blood too, is often the trigger for a complete freak-out!

W Situation phobias: All phobias that are the result of having to do something, or of having to be in a specific place, come under this heading. If you have a fear of flying you belong under this category, for example. Fear being in a lift or elevator? You’re here too. Shake and tremble

Before going to school? This is your category. Get the picture?

Perhaps the two most famous situation phobias are Claustrophobia, A fear of enclosed spaces, and Agoraphobia, A fear of open spaces.

W Miscellaneous phobias: A bit of a cop out, this heading! Anything that doesn’t come under the other headings in this list belongs here. For

Example, a fear of clowns (honest!), a fear of falling down when standing away from a wall (honest, too!), or a fear of getting ill (now that one you’ve heard of!), are all included in this category.

You can develop a phobia to anything. So don’t worry if you have a phobia

You think is strange. It’s a dead cert that someone else has had it before you.

Table 11-1 offers a very incomplete list of the variety of phobias out there. (We can’t list everything on the planet!) Don’t worry if yours isn’t there. It doesn’t mean that it doesn’t really exist, or that you are unique; all it means

Is that for whatever reason (not enough space, for one thing) we didn’t include it.

No matter how strange some of these phobias seem to be, they are very real

Fears for the people who experience them.

Before we get to the table, one phobia deserves special mention, if only for the sheer audacity of its name. And that is the phobia of long words, ironically known as hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia. Who says scientists

Don’t have a sense of humour!

Specific phobias

If you’re phobic about only one thing, you have a specific phobia. This used to be called Simple phobia, But as any phobic will tell you, there’s nothing

Simple about a phobia. Perhaps in recognition of this, science changed its

Name.

A Specific phobia Means your irrational fear is attached to one thing, and one thing only. You’re scared of heights and nothing else, for example. And it is

Only when you are in the presence of the actual phobic stimulus, or when you think about it, that you feel the fear.

More complex phobias

A Complex phobia Develops when the specific phobia you started off with

Spreads into other areas of your life. For example, you have a fear of snakes. You only felt scared when you thought about them, or when you were confronted with one in the zoo or on television. But now, your fear is starting to

Spread. You see a rubber snake in a toyshop and go apoplectic. The hosepipe

Lying on the ground fills you with fear and dread – after all, it looks like a snake!

Unfortunately, your phobia is generalising out and you are starting to fear other objects. This can lead to you becoming multi-phobic. In other words, you begin to develop phobias for other things. If this continues, your life can become more

And more restricted. In the end, you may end up with Agoraphobia - fear of open or crowded spaces – and become increasingly confined to your home. Being

Out, in the outside world, becomes an object of fear itself.

Some people are naturally Multi-phobic, Meaning they may well have more

Than one specific phobia, each one contained in its own little phobia world, bearing no relation to the others. A multi-phobic person may have a fear of flying. And a fear of wasps. And a fear of cats. And so on.

Removing Your Phobia through Hypnotherapy

One thing about phobias is that you can avoid dealing with them for only

So long. Eventually you have to face up to the fact that you must sort out

Your phobia. Why? Because your phobia is making your life unbearable and

Increasingly interferes with your family, social, and work life. Have no fear (get it? Have no fear?); your hypnotherapist is there to help.

A hypnotherapist can take several approaches to helping you get rid of your phobia. What all approaches have in common is that they bring your

Fear under control. In fact, hypnotherapy allows you to confront the thing

That freaks you out, with a sense of calmness and appropriate relaxation. You no longer avoid whatever it is; in fact, you look it straight in the eye and thumb your nose at it! You put your fear into proper perspective.

This doesn’t mean to say that you go from being unable to climb up a ladder

To standing on the very edge of the Empire State Building, looking down on

New York City below. It simply means that you’re able to deal calmly with

Those everyday occurrences of whatever it was that you were phobic about.

Your therapist won’t spring surprises on you. Many phobics come to hypnotherapy fearing that their therapist will suddenly produce whatever it is that they fear. That approach went out with the Ark! You won’t suddenly have

A spider dumped in your lap, nor will your therapist shut you in a room with his pet canary to cure your bird phobia. Of course, if this is what you want, it can be arranged. However, by far the majority of hypnotherapists don’t work this way. If you are at all concerned about unpleasant surprises, ask your

Hypnotherapist, in advance, about the approach they plan to use. If they intend to do something you don’t agree with, say ‘Thanks, but no thanks’,

And find someone else.

Starting with the basics

You’ve done it. You turned up for your appointment and are about to undergo

Hypnotherapy. So what can you expect? Well, for a start, your hypnotherapist

Is going to take a good case history (see Chapter 13 for complete info on giving a case history). As part of that case history, your therapist wants to know as

Much about your phobia as possible. Be prepared to tell your therapist

W When your phobia first started: This gives an indication of how your

Phobia came about in the first place, and may provide a pointer as to the therapy technique your hypnotherapist will use.

W When your phobia first became a problem for you: Could you cope

With the fear to begin with? What was it that eventually turned your fear

Into a full-blown phobia?

W Your worst phobic experience: This can be important as it may be a

Major contributing factor to the continuing build-up of your phobia.

W Your last phobic experience: How long is it since your last experience? How did that affect you?

W Whether anyone close to you has the same phobia: This may indicate

Whether you picked up the phobia from someone else. If you didn’t get it

From the person who shares your phobia, perhaps that person could be reinforcing your phobia, because they talk about their own phobic

Responses in front of you.

W Specific information about your phobia: The specifics are important, and your therapist will want to find out as much as possible about how you experience your phobia.

For a fear of heights, your therapist may want to ask you about the heights you can cope with, whether you cope if there is a barrier between you and the drop, how you feel if you see someone else standing in a high place, and so on.

For a fear of cats, your therapist may want to know if you cope more effectively with black cats or ginger cats, if a sleeping cat is less scary

Than a moving cat, how you feel when you see pictures of cats, and so on.

W How you want to be after your phobia is gone: It’s no good just focusing on the negatives, your therapist also wants to help you focus on the reason you are sitting in their therapy room. And that means finding out from you just how you want to be when you encounter that phobic stimulus. Remember, you can’t make things perfect – you must be realistic.

Most spider phobics don’t want to have one of their nemeses crawling

Around on their hand. Rather, they want to feel okay about picking one

Up out of the bath, on the end of a piece of newspaper, and flicking it out the window.

We’ll let you into a little secret. Even though you probably assume that the therapy occurs only when you are hypnotised, the truth is that the taking of the case history information is very therapeutic in its own right. Being able to

Talk about your problem to a sympathetic pair of ears is a great set-up for the

Formal hypnotherapy to come. And don’t worry; your therapist has heard it

All before. No matter how strange you think your phobia is, your hypnotherapist has, more than likely, encountered it at some point. Oh, and he won’t laugh, either!

Approaching the trance

So, what can you expect to happen in the trance? Your hypnotherapist may use several different approaches, alone or in combination with each other.

It may take more than one session to help you get rid of your phobia. Be prepared to carry out any homework assignments your therapist gives you to do

Between sessions – such as self-hypnosis – because these help the therapy

Process along no end. Being hypno-desensitised

A very popular approach based on a behaviour therapy technique, created by behaviourist Joseph Wolpe, has the rather posh title of Reciprocal inhibition. What that means is you can use one feeling to override another. The feeling you get when you experience your phobia is anxiety. Your therapist uses relaxation to override the anxiety. After all, you can’t be relaxed and anxious at the same time!

Several approaches to hypno-desensitisation exist. A very common one is

For your therapist to help you create something known as an anxiety hierarchy. Simply put, an Anxiety hierarchy Is a series of events you come up with regarding your phobia, ranked according to how much anxiety they produce. You rank these events from 0, which means that you feel no anxiety, to 100,

Which means that you feel the worst anxiety you can imagine. In hypnosis, your therapist gently takes you through the hierarchy, starting with the events ranked at 0, whilst giving you suggestions that you are calm, relaxed, and in control. He will then question you to find out whether you are indeed calm and relaxed. If you are, he then moves onto the next scene on your hierarchy. If at any point you feel anxious, your therapist will emphasise suggestions for relaxation so that you begin to feel relaxed again.

This is where the reciprocal inhibition really comes in – letting the relaxation wash away the anxiety. Don’t worry, your therapist won’t force you up the hierarchy too quickly, nor will he take you beyond the point at which you

Feel comfortable. By creating the association of relaxation with the various images from your hierarchy, you change the way your mind thinks about your phobia. When you encounter it in real life, you find that you cope very well indeed.

Going back to regression

This approach is sometimes used by analytical hypnotherapists who believe that to get rid of a phobia you need to understand and deal with its origin.

Your therapist basically takes you back into your past, to the time when the

Phobia began.

Your hypnotherapist asks you to witness what happened, and perhaps to

‘alter’ the event in your mind, so that you experience yourself coping well in

That situation.

Of course, you won’t alter the real event but rather your perception of it. By

Doing this, you create a domino effect that tumbles into the present, wiping

Out that irrational fear. For more on regression, see Chapter 2.

Accessing positive resources

This approach also uses regression, but this time to get resources from your past. These resources are positive feelings that allowed you to cope and feel good before; feelings such as relaxation, confidence, an inner sense of self-control, humour, and so on.

While in trance, you’re asked to create an image that represents your phobia.

You’re then asked to drift back in time and pick up wonderful, positive feelings that help you cope, and bring them forward to the present. You then are guided to fuse your positive resources to the image you created of your phobia.

By doing this, the resources overlay the anxiety the image produces (good

Old reciprocal inhibition!), and helps to alter the way you think about whatever it is you were scared of. When you are out and about and eventually

Encounter your phobia; you’re fine – calm and relaxed and wondering what

All the fuss was about.

Trying the fast phobia cure

This one is worth a brief mention as many hypnotherapists use it. It comes from a school of therapy called Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP), which

Hypnotherapists have adapted so that it can be carried out in trance.

The fast phobia cure essentially disrupts the way you maintain the thoughts and images you hold in your mind about your phobia. For more on this, and

NLP in general, turn to Chapter 15.

Following EMDR

Not strictly hypnosis this one, though many hypnotherapists are trained in its use. Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a very powerful technique originally developed as a treatment for trauma. However, it has also been shown to be very effective in the treatment of phobias.

In EMDR, you are asked to follow your therapist’s fingers with your eyes

As you hold certain images or thoughts in your mind. The idea is that this speeds up the way your mind processes upsetting events, allowing you to

Get rid of that phobic fear. Chapter 15 has more on EMDR and how it works.

Picturing your life without your phobia

The images, feelings, thoughts and pictures you had in your mind with regard to your phobia are what encourage and egg on the phobia in the first place.

After the main part of your therapy is complete, your therapist will take you

Forward in time, in your mind, so that you experience yourself coping effectively and thinking and feeling in a more positive way about whatever it was that used to cause your phobic response. This technique is called Pseudo orientation in time And is explained in Chapter 2.

The idea is to reinforce those changes made during therapy to the images, associated thoughts, and so on, which have been causing your anxiety. This allows you to view your phobia differently; to no longer view it as something that strikes terror into your heart, rather to view it as something you know

You can cope with very effectively. It is the icing on top of the proverbial therapy cake.

Confronting Your Phobia: A Contract for Action

If the icing on the cake is pseudo orientation in time (see the previous section), then the cherry that tops it off is the Contract for action. No, this doesn’t

Mean getting your lawyer in to look over some complicated legal contract.

Far from it; The contract for action Is simply an agreement between you and

Your hypnotherapist that, after you complete therapy, you will go out and confront your phobia. Some hypnotherapists may even write down what they want you to do in the form of a contract and ask you to sign it (remember it’s only symbolic, and definitely not legally binding!).

You may be thinking that this sounds very daunting. And, yes, it may seem daunting to you now, but remember that you’re asked to do this only After

Your therapy is complete. So, you should be feeling fine about your phobic object or situation. Also, as it’s you who is making the choice to go out and confront your phobia, you are in complete control of the situation.

In This Chapter

^ Defining past-life regression

^ Finding out how to get back to the past before you were born ^ Getting back to the present

J\ Nd now you seemingly enter the world of the mystical to find out how

To travel back in time to visit yourself before you were even born. We

Are, of course, talking about past-life regression (PLR), a therapy technique that many find baffling and many more find exceptionally fascinating. PLR is

An approach to helping you overcome your problem, based on the concept of

Reincarnation; A belief that your soul is reborn into different bodies and that

You have lived a life (or lives) before your current one.

For many in the Western world, the idea that we have lived other lives before

This one is frankly laughable. We have one life and once it’s over, that’s your lot.

End of story. But many millions of people throughout the world, both Western and Eastern, are just as convinced in their belief in the concept of having lived many lives in the past. And it is from this belief that the very powerful hypnotherapy technique of past-life regression has been developed.

Examining Past-Life Regression

Past-life regression (PLR) is one of the techniques that people often associate with hypnotherapy. PLR is a technique used in hypnotherapy that works with

A person’s belief in reincarnation. PLR takes you back in time, in your mind,

To visit a life, or lives, you lived before. PLR has wonderful esoteric connotations of the mystical hypnotist with staring eyes, lulling his subjects into a trance and then parting the curtains of the mists of time as they travel back to some major historical event. All very nice, and it looks wonderful in those

Low-budget movies; however the reality of PLR is actually quite mundane.

Hypnotherapists are not taught to tear apart the fabric of the space-time

Continuum – nor do they have the power! If you believe in reincarnation, then your hypnotherapist may consider using PLR.

Many people who believe in reincarnation think that traumatic or upsetting events that occurred in a life they lived before are the root cause of problems they’re experiencing in the life they’re leading now; especially if they feel that they didn’t have the opportunity to resolve those events before the end of that particular past life. PLR gives you the opportunity to resolve those events and by extension, resolve those issues in your current life that stem from them.

So, do you need to believe in reincarnation for PLR to be effective? The answer is no. To understand why this may be, have a look at the next section, ‘Beliefs

About PLR’.

In general, however, if you don’t believe in reincarnation, your therapist

Won’t touch PLR with a bargepole.

.jjfttNG/ Beware of a therapist who pushes her belief system onto you. It doesn’t

^y~ik\ Matter whether your therapist believes in past lives or not. Any therapist

(Wk ) worth her salt works with your belief systems, not hers. Your hypnotherapist

^P/ Should not try to influence you either way with regard to your beliefs in

Reincarnation – or hers.

Beliefs about PLR

Okay. So is PLR real? Who knows? As yet there is no absolute proof one way or

The other. Remember, we are dealing with belief systems here and that means,

If you truly believe you have lived before, then it is very real. . . for you!

Many people and therapists believe in the powerful therapeutic results of PLR, but don’t necessarily believe in reincarnation. So what do they believe

PLR is? Here are some of the most popular theories:

^ PLR accesses genetic memory. One school of thought believes that certain memories are encoded in our genetic make-up. In other words, somehow memories are stored in our genes. When you experience PLR, these

Memories are dragged up out of your DNA and once again experienced.

^ PLR accesses the collective unconscious. This idea comes from Jungian psychology. Carl Jung was around at the same time as Sigmund Freud. One of the many psychological theories he developed is that of the Collective unconscious. Jung believed that we all store in our unconscious

A whole host of memories that are shared by everyone, and which are passed down to us from our ancestors. PLR provides a means of accessing the collective unconscious and experiencing these memories.

^ PLR is a dissociative experience. This theory says that a person experiencing a PLR is creating a new existence in their mind from various pieces of their existing memory. Basically, you create a person and an existence through which you can ‘observe’ your problem, and its solution, in a metaphorical way – so that you’re split off, or dissociated, from

The problem. The distance provides a safe way to deal with the problem and the unconscious means to apply the solution.

^ PLR accesses memories from past lives. Okay, we’re back where we

Started. In this model, you believe that you’ve lived before and can access these past lives through hypnosis. As you access past lives, you can also influence them by helping your past self to resolve the unresolved issues that occurred in the life.

Whatever the truth of the matter about what PLR is, when it boils down to it

It’s Your Belief that is most important. So, if you truly believe that your problem stems from something that happened to you in a past life – and who’s to

Say you are wrong? – then discuss this with your therapist. If she judges that

It is right for you to explore this idea, then she will be happy to take you back into your past existence.

Reasons to revisit past lives

So, why do you want to go back and visit your past lives? Usually for one of

Two main reasons:

^ You’re simply curious and want to find out about who and what you

Were before you came into this life.

^ You believe that the problems you’re having stem from events that

Occurred in a life, or lives, you experienced prior to this one.

Many therapists happily help you explore your past lives for no other reason than you’re interested in who you were. But it is the second reason that

Explains PLR’s most common use in the therapy room.

As you go through life, you have many conflicts and experiences that you need to work through and resolve. However, there are also many that you

Don’t. Obvious so far, but this is where past-life theory kicks in. Past-life theory has it that some unresolved issues may well be so significant, that

When you pass into your next life they continue to affect you, creating some of the problems that you may now be experiencing.

That doesn’t mean to say that the unresolved issue you had in a past life will

Manifest itself in exactly the same way in your current life. Far from it, what

You’re likely to experience is something that is almost a metaphor for the

Past problem. For example:

^ Weight issues: It may be that you were starving in a past life, and your

Weight problem is an attempt to prevent that from occurring in this life.

^ Psychosomatic pain: It may be that you had a violent accident in a past

Life where a part of your body was seriously injured. In your current life you experience a pain for which there is no demonstrable cause, in a similar area of your body.

Psychosomatic pain Refers to pain that is purely in the mind. In other

Words, you are feeling pain somewhere in your body, but there is absolutely no physical cause for that pain.

^ Phobias: Maybe you were locked in a dark room, or cell, in a previous

Existence. That experience then filters through to your current life where you have an irrational fear of the dark.

^ Personality issues: Perhaps you were an oppressed peasant in a past

Life, always having to hold onto your emotions and feelings. In your current life you vent these feelings by being overly aggressive or emotional.

These are only a few examples of an almost endless list. In order to resolve these problems, you may need to go back to the life where they first occurred.

If you can resolve the issue in the past, the likelihood is that the problem in

The present fades away too. Of course, after your past-life issues are resolved, you may have work to do on your current life, helping you to adjust to the

Positive changes that PLR has brought about.

Often, your current problem is an accumulation of unresolved issues from a whole variety of past lives, each needing to be dealt with and resolved.

Journeying to Your Past Life

Okay, you and your therapist agree that it’s a good idea for you to go back and sort out those unresolved issues experienced by a past you.

The PLR session, or sessions, will be very similar in nature to any other hypnotherapy session, with just a few differences.

Revealing any past-life memories

Along with taking a normal case history, your therapist may also ask you about the following:

Your belief in reincarnation. Your therapist wants to know what your

Understanding of PLR and reincarnation is. After all, she’ll be working

With your beliefs. She also needs to know of any past experiences you

Had visiting former lives, either through a therapist or spontaneously.

(On rare occasions, some people spontaneously slip back into a past life when they are dozing, just about to fall asleep, or as a dream experience.)

^ Why you think that a past life experience may be responsible for your

Current symptom. What tells you that your solution lies in a past life? When you think about your symptom, what indicates that its cause lies way back, before you were born?

Just because you believe that your problem comes from a past life, that

Doesn’t mean that your hypnotherapist will automatically take you there. She will consider many factors before taking you down that route.

^ Whether you’re aware of the particular life responsible. Some people are very aware of the life responsible for their current problem long before they go for therapy. If you know, let your hypnotherapist know too.

Keep in mind that this may be only one of several lives contributing to

Your problem (then again, it may be the only one!). You may need to visit other lives before your problem is solved.

^ Any relevant dreams you’ve had. When you dream, you allow your

Unconscious to roam freely, and your unconscious may well access a past life. When you awaken, you may be aware that this particular dream holds something of significance.

^ Any spontaneous thoughts you have been having about past lives.

Is your unconscious trying to tell you something? Do you have spontaneous thoughts about events from a past that doesn’t seem to belong to you? Could this be your unconscious saying ‘Hey, this is where the seat

Of your problem lies!’?

Let your hypnotherapist know about any experiences on this list, because

Your awareness of your past lives may be pointing you in the right direction.

W CHEty. When many people think of reincarnation they often make the erroneous " assumption that they were someone famous in a past life. In actual fact, it is

Extremely rare to come across well-known characters from history. On the contrary, by far the most common manifestation of a past life is that of a very ordinary person. Is it likely that you were Henry VIII? No! A cook in the court of Henry VIII? Yes!

Choosing a route

There are many approaches to taking you back to a past life, none of which require magic or any special powers, so let’s leave that idea to the fantasists!

What route will you travel on through the centuries? Well, the path you take depends on the creativity of both you and your hypnotherapist. Your hypnotherapist may ask you to imagine one of several scenarios:

^ You’re walking down a long and comfortable corridor. On either side of

You are doors, with each one leading to a specific past life. Your therapist may invite you to find a door that is particularly attractive to you, for whatever reason, and to imagine walking through that door into the relevant past life.

^ You’re walking up a safe and well-lit tunnel. When you reach the end, you

Step out into your past life.

^ You’re climbing a gentle hill and when you reach its summit, you step

Out into another past life.

Or maybe you step into a time machine, or through the pages of a book, or through a mirror, or. . . the possibilities are endless.

Jjjt*M»E* Even though you think you know which life you need to visit at a conscious

Yf~M\ Level, your hypnotherapist may want to be unspecific when she takes you back.

Mi ) She may use a phrase along the lines of ‘And you can step through that door

Mjjjj/ Into the life that is most relevant to the reason you are with me today’. She isn’t

Ignoring you, she just knows that your unconscious mind will recognise the

Most important life you need to visit. Consciously you may think you know, but

Your unconscious often knows best in these cases. Let it be your guide!

Reaching a dead end

You step through the door with excited anticipation of entering into and

Exploring that past life and. . . nothing! Zilch! Not a sausage! Nothing except a

Big sense of disappointment.

So what’s going on? Why aren’t you getting anywhere on this journey? Well,

There can be several reasons, the main ones being:

^ You’re not ready to go back. Perhaps it was too early to try a PLR.

Maybe you need to do some more work in the present before you attempt to go back into the past. Yes, you believe in past lives, but

Maybe you have fears about going there. Perhaps you don’t fully trust your therapist yet, as that all-important rapport (see Chapter 13) hasn’t

Been sufficiently built up yet.

You can address whatever issues are putting up the roadblock with your

Hypnotherapist, and try PLR once they are resolved. ^ The route back was not right for you. If you don’t like the method of

Transportation (maybe the enclosed space of the tunnel makes you nervous, or the height of the hill seems too steep), the likelihood of reaching

Your past life destination is minimised. Why? Because if you feel a little uptight and tense, your unconscious mind protects you from taking a path that is not right for you.

To resolve this, discuss your feelings with your hypnotherapist and agree on a route that is more acceptable to you.

W Something in your current life needs to be resolved before you can

Go back. Maybe an issue in your current life is demanding attention.

Sometimes these issues can be very selfish and won’t let you go back

Despite your strong desire.

Your therapist can use techniques such as dissociation, or a regression, to the event in this life (Chapter 2 talks about these techniques), to help

Clear the current life roadblock (which, by the very fact it’s demanding attention like this, needs to be addressed), and therefore re-opening up your path into time.

W The problem doesn’t stem from a past life. If the genesis of your problem is not in a past life, you can’t go back to resolve it.

Of course, after you resolve your current life problem, your therapist

Can take you back through the portals of time just simply to have the

Experience, if you wish.

Whatever the reasons for not getting back to a past life, they can be cleared

Up. With a little perseverance from both you and your hypnotherapist, your

Past lives will open up like the pages of a wonderful history book.

What to Expect during Your PLR Session

Ready to go back in time, but are a little unsure as to what to expect? Well, read on, because these sections cover what you may find happening during your PLR session.

But wait! Before you go back to a past life, we need to point out one thing. One of the experiences that often take people unawares during a PLR session

Is that when they get back to their past life they may well find that they are

The opposite sex. That means a man may well have been a woman in a past life and vice versa. Let us just point out here and now that this is not a reflection of your sexual orientation, nor does it mean that you have a deep-seated desire for a sex change! It just means that the quirks of time travel do not recognise the gender boundary, and it is entirely possible that you were a member of the opposite sex in many of your past lives.

Setting the scene

During your PLR session, you are not necessarily going to step out of your current life and straight into a full, technicolor awareness of your past life. Your mind may need a little help orientating to this new experience and your therapist helps you get settled in through a process of questioning. She wants to find out from you:

W Who you are. No, she won’t just ask ‘Who are you?’ Your therapist needs to help you build up your awareness and may ask you:

• What you’re wearing

• How old you are

• Your name

W Where you are. Your therapist may ask you to tell her:

• What you see around you

• The name of the place you’re in

• The date

• The time of day

W What you’re doing. Your therapist may ask you to:

• Describe what you are doing (obviously)

• Explain why you’re doing it

• Share how you feel about doing it

W If anyone is with you. Your therapist may ask you:

• If anyone is with you (er, again, obviously!)

• If so, who that person (or persons) is and why they’re with you

• How you feel about having that person (or people) with you

This may seem to be quite an interrogation, but it is very important in helping you really get into the character and experience of your past life. Once

You are fully there, you can get on with exploring all that it contains. Who

Knows, you could be an ancient Greek standing on a cliff top, or a Victorian

Gardener going about his business, or even a proud Mayan mother tending to her children.

If you step into your past life and see nothing or hear nothing, bear in mind that you may be blind or deaf in that life, or perhaps you are in a dark or very quiet room! I (Peter) once carried out a PLR with a patient who reported that

They could neither hear nor see anything when we were trying to set the

Scene. In a moment of inspiration I asked that they reach out and tell me if

They could feel anything. A moment later they reported that they could feel a wall. It turned out that in the life they were visiting they were both deaf and

Blind.

In most cases, you experience the past life as if you are there, so don’t be surprised if your voice changes a bit and you feel the emotions you felt back then.

Visiting those important times

You’re in a past life, so now what? Is this the part of the life you need to visit? Not necessarily. This may only be your entry point to that life; a quite mundane period that allows you to adjust gently. On the other hand, you may step out into the thick of things; right into the heart of the matter, at the point in that life where the problems you’re experiencing in this one began.

Wherever you start off, your therapist will ask you to visit the important times in that life relevant to your problem. Keep in mind that there may be more than one event in more than one life. This is an insight gaining exercise, helping both you and your therapist understand how your problem got started. As you visit these times, your therapist may ask you what’s happening, how you’re feeling, and what you feel you need to do in this situation.

You may find that all your hypnotherapist does is ask you to experience these times. At times, you may feel the need to let out some emotion. If you do, go ahead and let it out. It may be that this pent up emotion has been festering away inside you in your current life, contributing to your problem.

By the way, if the thought of crying or laughing, or even shouting in front of

Your hypnotherapist is embarrassing, let us reassure you. Your therapist is very used to seeing displays of strong emotion and welcomes them as a

Healthy release for you. If you don’t feel any of these emotions, don’t worry -

There may be none for you to feel at this time.

Being present at your death

Right, put on your black armband and bring in the doom and gloom brigade,

Because this is where it gets a little morbid – but for a very good reason. How

You meet your end in the life you are visiting, may have a very strong relevance as to why you are experiencing your problem. For example:

W Was your death violent? If it was, it could very well be a contributing

Factor to your problem. The way in which you shuffled off this mortal coil may be representative of the reason you’re seeing your therapist.

Maybe you drowned and now have a phobia of water. Maybe you

Starved to death and now have a weight problem. Maybe you were poisoned and you now have irritable bowel syndrome.

If your death was peaceful, it may not be a contributing factor to your

Problem. However, what happened to your body after your death may

Be, so read on.

W What happened to your body after your death? In many cases, this can

Influence a current life problem. Maybe your body wasn’t discovered

And you have an unexplained sense of being lost in your current life. Or perhaps your body was unceremoniously cremated and you now have a phobia of fire. It could be that your body was misidentified and you were buried under the wrong name, and you now lack a sense of who you are.

W Was anything left unfinished at your death? Were there things you

Needed to do, but couldn’t as your life was cut short? Were there people you needed to say something to, but didn’t get the opportunity to do so?

Any unfinished business can follow through and cause havoc in your current life. Maybe you had unpaid debts in your past life and are too

Frivolous with your money in this one. If you didn’t show enough affection to a loved one you may find that you are now too emotional in relationships. It is possible that you were harsh with someone without

Getting the chance to apologise and now find that you carry a sense of

Guilt with you wherever you go.

Heating past hurts

You’ve been through it all; lived and died, and now have an understanding of

Why your problem started. Is that it? Is your problem resolved? Maybe. For some, the very act of gaining understanding is enough to kick a problem out

Of their lives forever. However, that isn’t true for every person or every problem. Not to worry. There is another step to take in your PLR session to help ensure that your problem is truly dead and buried.

To round off your session, your hypnotherapist gives you the opportunity

To ‘heal’ that past life. In other words, to go through it and make amends, to

Change what needs to be changed, to say what needs to be said and so on.

How can she help you do this? A very popular way is to visit the point of death (here we go with the morbidity again!), and as your spirit leaves your

Body, allow it to go through the life and to heal whatever it is that needs to be healed.

Resolving past-life problems

The problems of past lives manifest in many ways. Often, just going back and seeing the cause becomes the cure. Check out these examples:

W A patient came for therapy with a severe

Pain in her right shoulder. The medical

Community could not find anything wrong

With her, nor could they provide her with

Any lasting relief from the pain. Eventually, a friend of hers suggested that the pain may be present as a result of something that happened to her in a past life. Desperate to get the pain sorted out, she came for PLR hypnotherapy.

She entered into a life in which she was a Native American. Her village was attacked by a rival tribe, and during the onslaught,

She was shot in her right shoulder by an

Arrow. She didn’t die from the arrow but

From an infection that set in afterwards.

She carried the pain of the wound and the infection into her current life.

During a PLR session, she floated out of her

Body and laid her spirit hands over the

Wound in her shoulder. When she removed them, the wound had healed. When she came out of trance she reported that the

Pain she had been experiencing in her

Shoulder had finally gone.

W A man came to see us because he didn’t

Feel ‘grounded’ (his words) in his life. He

Had a strong belief in reincarnation and sensed that his feelings came from an

Event in a past life.

When he visited the relevant life in Tibet, he found that he had met a violent end and that his body had been left unburied. He immediately made the connection between his not feeling ‘grounded’, and the fact that his

Body had not been put into the ‘ground’

After his death.

In his spirit form, this unburied Tibetan found his sister from that life, and guided her to his body. She picked it up (she was very strong!) and carried it up a mountain and buried it beneath a tree near their village.

Several days after this session he called to say that he felt so much better, more grounded and able to concentrate on the

Important things in his life. W A patient came for therapy who had very

Strong feelings of frustration that she

Couldn’t pin to anything specific. She visited a past life where she was a wealthy landowner in Edwardian England (and very surprised to find that she was male). She’d

Had a good life and had died very peacefully, but unexpectedly, in her sleep. Unfortunately, prior to her death, she had a very

Nasty and prolonged argument with her

Best friend that resulted in their not talking

To each other anymore. She recognised

That she was to blame for the argument and

Decided to make amends and apologise.

Unfortunately, she came to this decision on the night the Grim Reaper came a-calling

And she never got the opportunity. She

Expressed an incredible sense of frustration over the fact that she had died with all that bad feeling between them.

In her spirit form, she was able to visit her

Friend as he dreamt and, after several

Lengthy dream conversations, was able to give her apology and have it accepted. She then left that life with a sense of freedom and lightness. She subsequently went on to

Leave her boyfriend and her job, go on the

Holiday of a lifetime, and returned to enter a career she had always wanted to be in, but

Had been afraid to try. Who says hypnotherapy doesn’t change your life for the better?

Completing the journey and

Returning to the present

So that’s it, the life is healed and there is nothing left to do. Just wake me up and I’ll be on my way then. Wrong! There is plenty more to do. After all, you don’t mend the hole in a tyre, but not put it back on the bike. You need to put

Your past life back where it belongs, and then make sure that nothing else needs fixing:

W Sever the tie to the past life. After you heal a past life, many therapists

Suggest that you sever the tie you have to that life, so that you can be sure that it will no longer influence you or encourage your problem to return. How they do this depends on the therapist. Some have you imagine cutting a silver thread that attaches you to the life. Some have you imagine that that you are permanently shutting and locking the door to that life. Others may be less specific and have you cut the connection in whatever way you feel is right for you.

Your therapist should suggest that before you sever any tie, you bring

With you all the positive learning that the life gave you into your current existence.

W Come out of the past life. It is important that you are formally brought out of the past life. If you simply emerge from it, you may be somewhat disorientated. Don’t worry; the disorientation will pass in time. But to avoid this, the general rule of thumb is that you’re brought out of a past life the same way you were taken into it. If you stepped through a door,

You step back through a door. If you walked down a tunnel, you walk back up a tunnel, and so on.

W Check that there are no other lives you need to visit. Before you are fully

Re-oriented back into your current life, your therapist should help you to check that there are no other lives that need to be visited. After all, more

Than one life may be contributing to your problem, and you want to clear the lot out in order to really ensure that it has been dealt with.

You may find that you can do this in one session, or it may need to be done over several sessions, depending on how much needs to be worked through in each life.

Whether you are doing it for fun, or using it to solve a problem, you will find

That every hypnotherapist will have their own particular approach to carrying out PLR. Whatever your reason is, you will find that a visit to your past

Selves can be a very interesting, rewarding, and ultimately problem releasing

Experience for you.

Past lives are not the only ones you can visit. Some therapists will work

With you to find out what happens during your inter-life experience. In other words, exploring what happens between each of your lives. Yet other therapists will have you experience future lives – those that you have yet to live

After you kick the bucket in this one.